As I turned 23 on Wednesday, and besides drinking far too much bubbles and devouring birthday cake, I reflected on everything I had learnt and how much I continue to learn on this crazy roller coaster called life. I discovered Fanta zero tastes just as good (if not better, controversial?) as regular Fanta, I have far too many embarrassing drunken stories and hangovers do get worse the older you get. I have gained and lost friends in the same year, trusted the wrong people and stayed in relationships I really didn’t want to be in; and I’ve come to realise that it’s not selfish to make time for yourself. So, here are some of the 23 things I have learnt in my 23 years.
“Do one thing every day that scares you”.
We all have our comfort zones, for some they extend wider than others and for some they are smaller, but we all have that psychological state of familiarity, where we feel in control and even a small shift outside the familiarity may cause low levels of stress or anxiety. There is nothing wrong with familiarity, it is safe and we take comfort in knowing; knowing that we have security and stability in our lives. There are many people who seek more, who spend their lives excelling out of their comfort zone on a day-to-day basis. Most of us fear change, whether we like to admit it or not, change makes us feel uneasy; it’s a shake up in our routine. Attempting to step out of your comfort zone will involve changes in habits and routine, and getting used to it will not happen overnight. A lot of people believe that if they have been doing something for a long time, then it obviously is working, so why change it?
This is a subject I have wanted to write about for a while but I was waiting for the right words — We are living in a time in history where we have over 8 billion people, around the world, at our finger tips; people we can interact with. But can this level of international connection and ease cause issues when it comes to dating and relationships?
If we look back at dating through history, a lot has changed. No longer do we need to give people our home phone numbers or provide them with any real details other than a means of contact and proof you aren’t a catfish! Taking a step back, we can see how far courtship and relationships have altered throughout time. Nowadays, by some people, monogamy is seen as insignificant and more of a “status symbol” and represents a privileged position within society, rather than a symbolism of love. Even in the last decade, there has been a vast change in how we meet and date people, and how we communicate with each other in general. Our eyes are glued to our phones, necks bent over and there are many who have forgotten how to have a real conversation (this has led to an increase in anxiety, but I will save that for a later post).
It was very common for people to meet their partner at a young age, marry young and spend the rest of your life with that one person. Thus, nowadays, the process of dating, falling in love and getting married has somewhat turned on its head, and finding that “special someone” can be a lot more challenging than it once was. It seems we are a society of commitment-phobes, we are afraid to commit to one person and, as they say on Love Island, afraid to “put all our eggs in one basket”. It seems that people require a back-up, if one person doesn’t work-out there is someone laying in wait for them to date next, but how is this attitude affecting relationships?
Hi, my name is Molly, I’m 20 years old and I live in England. Originally from Wales, the move from my small welsh town to a rather larger city was quite daunting. If it wasn’t hard enough leaving home to study, leaving my family, I had to also learn my way around a new place and meet new people – which at the time I was incredibly anxious about, due to suffering with severe social anxiety (more on that in later posts). However, I survived the move, living alone in a new place and I have never felt happier. The story isn’t an simple as that, I must add, but I will delve into the depths of my life in future posts no doubt, this is a brief introduction. I’m a writer and amateur filmmaker, going into my second year at university studying Film Production Technologies and currently working for a company as their videographer – an experience I am incredibly grateful for. I enjoy every aspect of my educational and working life, constantly meeting new people and making contacts that could be extremely valuable in my future career. The creative industries are very competitive and getting your foot in the door can be difficult, so making sure I’m getting my name out there and already making a name for myself is important to me.